What would YOU change about Georgia?

During the two short weeks of my stay in Georgia, Nata and I have asked this seemingly random question to people from all walks of life and age to gauge the discontent in the wonderful country of Saqartvelo. Except form the points Energy and City Planning (added by me) everything was solely based on Georgian citizens’ opinion and experience. I have collected them here in a short overview to give people a chance to see that they are not alone in their opinions. Change in a democracy can happen if people realise that they are not alone and that their representatives should fight for a brighter future for all.
Please note that I haven’t been able to touch upon subjects such as health, nationalism, economy, or political election campaigns. The list is not complete, and more people (maybe experts) would need be asked what they would want to change.

Education

Schools and educational institutions are in a dire strait. Their quality is horrible, children and adults are not educated well, they are poorly informed about their voice and power. This does not even touch upon trivial lessons like mathematics, science, or languages and the like. We refer purely to the political education. For a healthy democracy to establish itself and grow in power and reach, every citizen needs to be informed about what they can do, what their role is in a democracy and what the servants of the state (i.e. politicians) are supposed to do for the improvement of the country. Also, the education should aim at teaching people how to discuss instead of fighting each other.
Furthermore, teachers have very little respect for their pupils and themselves, for they do not know what their purpose is. If they truly wanted to push their pupils’ interests and knowledge, they would be impartial as to where pupils get their knowledge from – their role is not to be the only teachers, but to help guide the flow of knowledge and fact-check their pupils.
Pupils need more time in between classes to rest, eat and spend their energy instead of rushing from one classroom to another and being punished for not being able to go to the toilet and eat in a 5-minute break. Teachers don’t trust their pupils, believing they will “run off” or go home if allowed to play in the yard during breaks. This should be a huge warning sign to everyone working in the education sector.
Sexual and drug education are not being taught in schools in Georgia. Although these represent an important part of young people’s concerns and interests, education on harmful drugs (and use) as well as procreation and the dangers of unprotected sex are virtually being silenced by the state. Without proper education, the young society is at risk of become depended on drugs and may be exposed to an unnecessarily high risk of STDs and unwanted pregnancy (and, of course, unfulfilling marriage).
While the education is not used to address these problems, overwhelming propaganda campaigns are launched to discredit democratic institutions and create a split between social groups.

Political Institutions

Certain political institutions need to put in place to reduce the risk of abuse of power. They mustn’t be influenceable by political figures. Their role is to observe that all political procedures are respected, and, if there is an abuse, immediate reactions must follow, no matter the political orientation of the observer or he who has done the abuse. It is absolutely necessary to introduce them to the political field.
TV is not an institution and should never be used by one party only to promote their ideas and spread their propaganda, which is sometimes portrayed in a perverse utopian and disillusion way that touches upon the most basic of all human drives. Not only can a TV help awkward couples unwind and get down to action. It can also enlighten people of all creeds and nations to possible solution and inspiring skills and talents.

Power

Anyone who enters the field of politics in Georgia is going to change his or her comportment. They will no longer use public transportation and factually isolate themselves from the common people. The chief reason why people would choose the path of politics is not an altruistic wish to make Georgia a better place for everyone to live in, but purely a reason to establish themselves as powerful and wealthy people. Being in power comes with certain perks, such as modern car and driver, housing in healthy neighbourhoods, relations with business and economically strong players. To reduce the abuse of power, the attractiveness of a political position needs to be curbed.

Culture

Albeit having a Black Sea Arena might at first sight seem like a nifty thing to have, upon closer inspection it will become all too clear that this is simply a trick to cover the lack of political and financial support for culture. The tickets are often very expensive and out of reach for most Georgians, the Arena is barely used at all (5 concerts in 2023). While this Arena is used as a political propaganda flagship by the leading Georgian political party, Qartuli Otsneba, the voice of the opposition is being repressed and discontent continuously ridiculed. Small Georgian musicians and artists are not able to establish themselves nationally and internationally for lack of support, while millions are spent on bands that were famous 10 years ago. A shift in financial aids is imperative for a healthy cultural sphere and an artistic expression of people’s voices.

Employment

At the time of writing, working in Georgia can be both extremely challenging and disappointing for there are very few regulations to prevent abuse and exploitation of the working force by their respective employer. While this could be seen as beneficial for small businesses that would struggle from high spendings on human resources, uneducated and inexperienced workers will never develop an adequate spending power and will forever dwell in poverty. Introducing policies that would require every employer to fix contracts for their employees and guarantee them a minimum salary would be a first step towards a fair marketplace, a new burgeoning social class and a great economic boost.

Military

The Georgian military is reserved primarily for the less-fortunate, not educated and for those most prone to fall for nationalistic propaganda campaigns. Because of the poor mental state of the cadets, orders are not understood well. If the military was aiming at creating a strong defensive force it would have to train educated, able-bodied and able-minded people to be resourceful and efficient. It would, furthermore, need to equip their soldiers with modern weaponry instead of using used, rusty, and worn-out Soviet equipment. Finally, overall fitness of Georgians is questionable, and many would probably not be able to even the lowest requirements for the military service (should they be drafted). Having a healthy population is paramount to creating effective defensive capabilities. It would also serve as a deterrent against potential further Russian expansions.

Nature preservation

The preservation of the extraordinarily beautiful, diverse, and rich nature of Georgia is strictly limited to a few national parks such as Vashlovani or Borjomi. However, the greatest part of the Georgian society is only dimly aware of their environment if at all. In fact, the country is suffering under the weight of trash thrown into ditches next to roads, in rivers, in forests and everywhere imaginable. Though garbage collectors are working regularly and under pitiable conditions, only a fraction of trash is collected. Plastic bags roam the streets, cigarette stumps are ubiquitous. Grazing animals and stray dogs are eating them, and the trash returns to humans in another form. Recycling is but a word. No efforts have been taken to reduce garbage use or recycling. If the government does not address the problems as such, the country is going to be covered in trash, which will have serious effects on tourism and on Georgian citizens’ health. Campaigns that target people’s awareness of their own impact may come in handy.
Industry pollution is another issue. Emissions are being emitted without filters and enter the ecosphere from the air and the water. These are often toxic and have seriously detrimental effects on humans, plants, and animals alike. Standards need to be introduced to save lives.

Mobility & Transportation

Georgia has to transition away from a car-driven economy and transportation to more eco-friendly and efficient means. Living and traveling/commuting in Georgia means being exposed to constant dangers of life. While millions of cars drive at unreasonable speeds on tricky roads without any attention to street rules, pedestrians most often walk on the streets, thus exposing them to drunk drivers, mud, smog and other unpleasantries. Beside the two or three mediocre trains operating in Georgia, almost all transportation in car based. Constant traffic jams, high carbon emissions and a strong dependency on energy imports from Russia and Azerbaijan are the consequence – a consequence Georgian politicians don’t want to address. Stress and a higher mortality are also linked to the Georgian dream that is a stinky and polluting mobility. For the streets of Georgia to calm down and allow for a smoother mobility, steps must be taken. These include blocking roads to cars, allocating a strict parking policy that has every wrong-doer’s car removed, construction of park houses, allowing for safe spaces for pedestrians and cyclists, connecting public transportation hubs. A safe and clean mobility also requires high investments into trains and railways in general, including the metro in Tbilisi and possibly the creation of a tram along the river Mtqvari. The rights of pedestrians must be protected by the police. Ruthless behaviour by car drivers has to be stamped out, awareness about pedestrians have to be raised during driving lessons. Last but not least streets in Georgia need to be renovated and all potholes closed. This primarily concerns people from poorer towns and cities who also do not have the means to have a solid car insurance nor the means to repair their cars.
Precarious roads like the Rikoti Pass are suffering from closures more and more often. The Road and Street Department of the State (should it exist) must solidify the road and keep it clear of huge snow fall, erosion and other naturally occurring hazards.

City planning

Everyone who has ever stepped foot into Didi Dighomi will know what a faulty and inconsistent city planning looks like: chaotic, dirty, uncomfortable, and perilous. Drivers have to be very careful to even get there, as hour-long congestions and missing exists from the main road artery are a permanent concern. Once there, high buildings for a growing population are being built without any respect to the local geography, the population density, mental health, and circulation. As there are no metro stations and few bus lanes, most workers are forced to commute by car, hence taking up more space than they would need to. An acute lack of parking lots causes people to park anywhere they seem fit – no authority seems to pay attention to this. There are barely any, if any at all, pedestrian lanes (trottoirs), which makes moving through the newly built quarter capricious and deadly.
The absolute lack of pedestrian lanes in general in Georgia is a statement of disrespect towards the less wealthy, to those who like to stroll, and the youth, who are not allowed to drive. This is a huge issue all over Georgia and is not limited to the capital.
Seemingly no thought has gone into city construction or urban development in general. Buildings are built anywhere with little regard for the inhabitants. Houses are often not attached to existing sewage lines; they have no access to gas and electricity. Cities grow continuously and in an unrestrained manner. To curb tumorous towns, a virtual grid must be established which defines where and how can be built in certain locations. For this reason, town halls need to employ more people and digitalisation must step forward.
Cities should also employ water evacuation systems that allow for the surplus of rainwater and a safe passage of water into the rivers. Water purification plants also need to be built along the rivers of Georgia to preserve the hydro eco system and provide with fresh fish for locals.

Agriculture

Farmers are unable to sell their produce in Georgia, as competing producers from abroad produce cheaper than Georgian farmers (meat is being imported from Brazil, many vegetables come from Türkiye). Not only does this result in a massive rural evasion and an unhealthy inflow of uneducated country folk into urban areas (hence destabilising both cities and villages), but it also means that the general quality of produce drops immensely. Controls on the safety of imported produce may be lower than controls on locally grown produce made with Georgian standards.
Farmers should be incentivised to stay in their hometowns, earn more for their hard work and have safe spaces in the city where they can offer their produce to people. The difference in taste and colour tells a tale of difference in quality and Georgian citizen should listen to the story. After all, Georgians have suckled on beans grown in Georgia during the hardest time of their existence. What if this resource is suddenly not available anymore?

Energy

Energy-wise the country of Georgia depends chiefly on imports of natural gas, petroleum, and other fossil fuels from its autocratic neighbours. As we have seen the budget of the military powers of Azerbaijan and Russia rely on exports of fossil fuels. In order to reduce the risks of further escalations and loss of territory of Georgia, spendings on fossil fuels must drop significantly. Investments into clean energy is essential for a peaceful future. Becoming energy independent would signify a decrease in military projection of Georgia’s neighbours and an increase of the Georgian national budget, which is turn can be spend on their own defence capabilities.
80% of its electricity needs are covered thanks to their richness in water and the possibility to erect dams. However, due to climate change and uncontrolled grazing of cattle, as well as an inefficient heating of towns with wood, improper ways will sooner or later translate into the premature melting of glaciers and a drop in water availability. The switch to clean energies such as solar or wind power – both of which are widely available in Georgia – could result in many positive outcomes: energy sufficiency, cleaner power, reduced dependency on energy imports, democratisation through community-led solar power plants, boost of the local economy, and many more.

Orientation

East? West? Or rather North? Why not try South?
Georgian politics focus on providing its citizen with unrealistic, perverse, and utopic ideas of what the future of Georgia looks like, without offering actual relief for the poor and those in need. It also doesn’t boost business-minded people, as your success largely relies on contacts within the government or your political orientation.
Georgia has had their golden ages, and it seems like these days lay in the past and cannot be rekindled. Which is deceptive, as the past offers important figures like Queen Tamar or Davit the Builder who have pushed the kingdoms through innovation, calculated thinking, gender-equality, and breakdowns of corruption and nepotism.
Georgia does not need to look East or West and try to wedge itself somewhere between two equally disastrous powers, but rather find its own way, that suits its intentions and culture. Therefore, it is most important for Georgian citizen to remember what they strive for: A strong culture, a beautiful nature and hospitable people living in their homelands where they can preserve their way of living and being. I believe that by implementing the above-mentioned points and some more that I haven’t been able to research in the last 2 weeks, Georgia may soon find itself in a position of power, where its people can breathe clean air, stay the beautiful people that they have always been and decide in unity what the next course of action should be. Georgia can be a beacon of hope and democracy in a rapidly evolving world. The earlier people realise their potential, the sooner they can leave behind the weighty past and look forward again.

And don’t forget: Violence is not an opinion, nor is it a sign of democracy and understanding of different point of views. Violence used by the state is inherently wrong and is but a projection of politicians’ inability to tackle a problem in a civilised way.

A memorandum to Georgia

Please not that the following lines are highly personal and that they may or may not represent the whole truth. However, they do represent a truth, my truth. A truth that had partially been written during the onset of a bacterial illness and in the cold and dark month of February.

First of all, I believe a short introduction would be necessary. Some wider context is needed for you, the reader, to understand where I am and what is going on. After my frustrating months in Central Asia, may they be as instructive as they have been, I decided to head back to Georgia to visit my friends, following an emotional sickness, eat food without meat and possibly find a job here. I had taken matters into my own hand, had freed myself of most of my worldly possessions and had set my mind on trying something new for myself. It turned out to be more difficult than anticipated.

But let’s not dive too deep into these organizational matters, for they are quite boring and serve no greater purpose. It suffices to say that I moved to Kutaisi, following my intuition and the advice of a foreign friend who has settled here and seemingly adores the city. Right from the start I got in touch with a young local couple owning a teaching-center, start-up palace and who asked me straight-away if I wanted to give English lessons. I agreed. Two or three month passed without any greater evolution of my working and overall situation. I have a flat by myself, yet no one to share it with. I had the outlook for acquiring a teaching position with no fixed program, allowing me to freely teach as I see fit. I have some financial reserves and no immediate pressure to actively seek employment. I did watch a few extraordinary films, all-time classics and some that are advisable for all to watch. I read a few books.

Almost every book is based on violence. Luckily the English teaching one is peaceful.

View from my former flat.

The months passed. I witnessed the Georgian parliamentary elections. I saw the former president Mikhail Saakashvili return from his Ukrainian exile (just in time, I’d say). Misha returned and so did the snow in Rustavi. I experienced public transportation in Georgia. I followed Georgian news on the war in Ukraine. I observed the everyday Georgian life, the routine. I mused about the fascinatingly slowness at which everything and everybody moved, not taking into consideration the drunk drivers all over this country, who cannot wait to die in a tragic accident. And all the suicidal Glovo bikes who face the traffic jams of Tbilisi with a stern fanaticism, proudly carrying the banner of exploition into their glorious death. Banzai!

I remember Georgia from seven years ago, when I fresh came from high school into this promising Caucasian state that was still forgotten by most of the world. The overall infrastructure and life standards seemed to be increasing slowly but steadily. People were friendly, hospitable, exceedingly interested in meeting and talking to European strangers.

Of course, I am aware that my situation was an altogether different one. I may have had this veil of naivety, which shielded of a great number of uncomfortable truths, Well, it has been lifted. I see things clearly now. And I am bitterly disappointed.

I will satisfy myself with only one concrete example: politics. You think that politics are boring? Especially this dull process of going to the voting booth and give your voice to somebody? Fear not, in Georgia it pays off! Upon voting for the right party, the Qartuli Otsneba, in short Qotsi (note that this is awfully close to the German words “kotzen”, which means to throw up) you will receive 20 Lari and/or a sack of delicious potatoes. Yes, you may suffer from four years of hardship and an ever increasing slithering towards a pro-Russian dictatorship, but behold! you will eat well for one week.
These are the voters, who happily give their voice and receive something in return. Others, especially state workers, were forced to vote for the ruling party (in power since 2012) under the threat of losing their jobs.
Of course, in the end all of this pressure is hardly worth the effort, as the elections were rigged anyway and a majority of the people did vote for Qotsi, despite the obvious fact, that the leading politicians work on their own, personal agenda. It’s disappointing, that any reasonable being would vote for a political party that is so openly corruptible.

I realise that I sound harsh and unfair. However, it becomes clear to me that Georgia is moving away from being truly European. Not the individual people, certainly not my close friends here, who I adore more than anybody else, but the whole dirty edifice as a whole. The war in Ukraine (yes, it’s called a war, Putin, you sad, empty cunt!) is the famous drop that was one too many. It’s a disgusting display of sheer power whoring, of reckless lying and manipulating, coupled with a creeping hollowing of the free and concerned public opinion.
The valiant, empathetic Georgian people rose up and demanded their government for immediate support for the harassed, bleeding Ukrainian defenders. The political leadership answered unanimously – with silence. Well, okay, with a small outcry, condemning Russia’s move. But did any actions follow?
( a bit of a badly structured paragraph, I might rephrase it a later stage )

Slava Ukrainiy!

When I was on my 20-hours bus ride through Turkey, I had a lot of time to reflect on what lays ahead. When I first lived here I was in love and its magic made me oblivious to certain aspects of the unpleasant reality; where there was wonder, love and excitement, now sadness reigns. I have become anxious, fearing that I might be ran over by a drunk Georgian driver at any time. Or mistaken as a Russian and injured for this reason. I feel disillusioned. I had hugged Georgia and its mode-de-vie, but the embrace has been loosened and instead of the warm and affectionate feeling an awkward silence imposed itself. There’s a dwelling anger in my chest.
Therefore, it appears evident that my time here in this country comes to a close. I resolve to leave ere summer, with no mind to buying a return ticket.

Before closing this chapter I must, however, bring a small memory back to my mind. It was on my excursion to Tkibuli (ტყიბული) that I met some excellent Georgians in a restaurant. I join their drinking and feasting party. Despite the war in Russia and their ever-increasing hatred towards the Russian language, they conversed with me, therefore overcoming their unease, anger and sadness for the sake of communication: an altogether smart and wise approach. We enjoyed our reciprocal company. Upon hearing that I was going to leave Georgia one man asked me not to forget them.

That was all he demanded. To remember that scene. The true identity of one part of Georgia. A welcoming, warm, hospitable and out-goinf one. One that overcomes problems, personal and the ones that are a produce of society and the environment. And I am happy for this memory and for many, many more.

But I have made up my mind about leaving.

Off, I will go, into the west.

Georgia on my mind ✌

One to the people. One to the times. And one for the future.

I’ve got this request from a fellow student and a dear friend of mine, whether I’m going to write about friendship and my relationship with some people that I got to know in Russia. And I thought that, yeah sure! Why not tell a few stories.

What exactly did she ask? Hold on, gotta check it quickly… aha… yeah! She wanted to write about “us”. I was also surprised about this way of putting it. Indeed, she wanted to do it herself and I gently wished her good luck, telling her to deliver “качество” (Russian for quality). Apparently, I must have misunderstood her, for she corrected herself, requesting me to do it. “So, like, about our friendly relationship, the Erasmus kids or Kazan?”, I wondered. Then she suggested me to do a combo of all three things, believing I would come up with something suitable for her request (somebody has to believe in me at least), and that it would be amazing if I could add some nicknames to polish the story a little. So be it! Here’s one to friendship.

Going through the articles that I published on Russia so far I distinguished a relatively persistent negative trait that connects my impressions on different topics. Of course, it would be unfair to treat everything as if it had been awful or unpleasant. Though there were times where I had wished to be far away, longing for a common sense of rationality or a simple vegetarian restaurant, the opposite was also sometimes the case. It was the constant energy and support of a handful of people that kept me going through this experience. I feel like I owe them a lot. For it was their complete determination to abstain from any surrender of their personality that made them so valuable an asset to the group dynamic of our class and to my mental well-being. All of us faced the same problems – some were, of course, more prepared for them then others – giving that their language skills were more advanced, be it that they could cope with the general food quality easier than me -, my friends remained true to their principles and personal ideologies. Now that I’m considering who’s the most deserving to have a part in my story, I’m experiencing difficulties deciding. All of my friends from there had their own personal characteristic traits that made them stand apart from the crowd. On top of that, I wish not to anger anyone by not mentioning them. I will, however, restrict myself to the most close friends of mine.

First of all, I would like to present KyöstiOfficial to you. It’s basically the only one who actually truly had his nickname during the project, stemming from his Instaprofile. KyöstiOfficial has the special ability that he does precisely and only exactly what he wants to do. Never would he forcefully make himself change his mind. Nor would be pretend to like something that he was, in fact, against. As he appeared to be a strong-minded personality who would never betray his own intentions or lie to anyone, we always sought to introduce him to our casual hangouts. What’s more is that he was constantly high on snooze, pushing small baggies of tobacco in between his upper lip and his gum (which added something to his mysterious and unique nature). He most secretly attend the Russian classes: He would be sitting in the back rows, not steering a muscle during discussions rounds in the vain hope of not being asked to add to our thin round. He was certainly not invisible, and indeed he was greatly appreciated by all the teachers, despite his intermediate Russian. It was possible that for the exact reason that they all loved him (and so do all of his friends) that they always wanted him to speak. Life can be really troublesome sometimes… Жизнь не сахар!
With him I rode all the way to the Russian steppe in search of some peaceful place, that probably reminded us of our homes, where the mind isn’t disturbed by the constant chatter or the constant harmful car emissions. The path there had us come up with creativity to figure out how best to react to changes in planning. In the end it seemed like a never-ending recalculations, with mathematical formulas in disarray. Blablacar switched into hitchhiking, bus, train, hitchhiking, almost taxi and more hitchhiking. His patience was truly unbeatable during this trip. We may not have bought the Sterlitamak magnets, we managed to take a pic with dear Vladimir Iilich in Salavat.

This is not Lenin

Except from our irregular trips somewhere or the camping in woods, we didn’t leave Kazan together as one complete group very often. On one of those occasions we went to take a bath in march. The vapour was escaping the steamy tent in large white clouds as we protruded the place to take refreshing refuge in the clear water of the Blue Lake, the Глубакое озеро. Having felt the strange aqua-thermal sensation, we longed for the smiling group of students who all studied Russian and their engulfing warmth. Many of us had gone through much during that time – the adaptation to the absurdity that was on Russian level was comforting and challenging, for most were happy to return home after their stay (at least for a still unknown time) – so that the support and guaranteed respect for each other was always something we could count on. Let loose in a somewhat bizarre world, we created bonds between each other that would overcome nationalities, or rather, thrive thanks to the differences in our upbringing and culture. Some lived up to the expectations of national stereotypes (e.g. a predilection for drinks in Finish people, the spirited, Italian hand movements while talking,…) while others shook the foundations of the classical way of displaying the life of their specific home country. It was especially the Germans (or those living there) who did their best at shattering any German stereotype: punctuality and efficiency. We would eventually reach a certain point, where even the most obstinate teacher would stop questioning our late arrivals in class.

Clearly one extraordinarily remarkable character is the musician and friend of fine arts and he’s no other than Mr. Schubert. First name: Ludwig. You wouldn’t believe what value a brilliant name such as his possesses; it can literally grant you access to place that would have been out of your reach. In many occasions it fully astonished new acquaintances. They would be merry. As a fine addition Ludwig sometimes added that he’s playing the piano, which instantly made him become something of a musical icon. Even the officials usually plaintive world was shattered for a millisecond, so that they gave him the key to the piano room where he could play all by himself for hours. I wish for him that he eventually gets him piano at home in Berlin. It would mean an infinite evenings of jolly evenings!

He was one of my first acquaintances when I moved to Berlin and has ever since welcomed my into his flat. There we would discuss our time in Berlin and the near future – all that with a glass of wine at hand. The idea to visit Russia and to experience all of its absurdities would eventually strike us as a promising plan. Little did we know at that time that we would be dropped in an intensive two weeks of dealing with bureaucracy and preparing for the interview with an official from a Russian university, which, despite the coffee and black tea in our bloodstreams, went fairly acceptable (I might have called the city St.Petersburg by its old name Leningrad).
As devoted readers may have already read, we did move to the Russian city of Kazan right on the Volga Хуйолга river for reason of academic studies. We would share a shared flat with a brainless English guy – dear old Mikey-boy kept us wishing that he might take a looong and frosty stroll through the endless forests of Northern Siberia – and discover all of Russia’s countless absurdities and contrasts. Thanks to his photographic interest I could rest my freezing hands in the warm entrails of my jacket without bothering too much about taking photos. If I spotted something, it was easier for him to capture the moment, rather than risking frostbite myself. Whenever we returned to our shared room, we would warm ourselves with some illegal alcohol that was always comfortably stacked away in the dark corners of our wardrobes and prepare a simply dish, such as French onion soup. A nice onion soup requires long hours of slow cooking and some more of that illegal substance called wine; it’s smell filled the hallways, equally distributing the odour of white wine throughout the building.
Much more can be said about our tricky situation in Kazan and the way we mutually assisted each other in dealing with bureaucracy, strict authorities, stubborn teachers and our inner temptation to let everything be, but I’d rather end this part by referring to an older article (i.e. Breathing in the air of Glasnost and other stories from within the Ural mountain range) and my greatest gratitude towards him for following through with our silly plan to its end.

One plan that didn’t fully fail, despite ever changing means of transportation that drastically change throughout our preparation time at home and during our stay in Russia, including as many possibilities as six: buying an authentic LADA with which we could have traversed all of Russia in a speed similar to the development of public opinion in Soviet Russia, renting a car, taking a train, hitchhiking, taking marshrutka or even asking for military support (considering Ludwig’s uncle’s proximity to Russian military, this appeared somewhat within the limits of the possible). Even our initial idea to move to Yekaterinburg instead of Kazan was quickly thrown overboard. Little of what we planned actually did come into effect.
We are in a crass contrast to the Italian students. All of them appeared to know what their future will look like. That is, apart from on an emotional basis, where they surprised us and, mostly likely, themselves with their sudden changes in partners. The absurdities didn’t seem to bother them as much since they hadn’t really put too much consideration into this matter.
Both Russian mindset and its language seem to be about equally complicated to understand and mastering both at the same time requires a lot of attention and work. There’s different ways of how best to deal with this problem. Combining them worked best for me, as I got to e.g. listen to songs (mostly Viktor Coi) and then analyse the lyrics so in order to memorise new words by hearing the words repeatedly in your head while rambling through Kazan. Other ways could include literature or playing a theater role in a Russian piece. There were those students who approached the language learning process from a practical direction. However, apparently a language can be treated solely as a means of communication, therefore, dealing with the cultural or political aspect can be disregarded as useless. Some of our fellow foreign students had, prior to Russia, learnt a very decent level of Russian that was almost flawless when it came to grammatical aspects, however, they had troubles naming a single Russian band upon meeting us. They were immune to all of the nonsense that was forced on us, because they hardly questioned the system in any critical way which gave them an incredible advantage. It was especially the Italian students, who were surprised to know that the system Putin has (re-)introduced some very silly laws (though some locals were also not informed about it as well).

Maybe it was the obvious oblivion for most features of Russian musical culture and questionable political delusions that made a handful of people disciplined to a degree that they could communicate almost entirely in the Russian language outside of (sometimes) frustrating courses while, simultaneously, prepare for IELTS test and translate all of Homer’s Odyssey from English into Italian. Time to introduce to the blog a new Italian girl: Beatrice, the girl that goes by a different name, but who inspired me to write this very entry that you are reading at this moment.
Beatrice is extremely devoted to the cause and took up the challenge of living in Russia and learning the language with ease – or at least so it appeared. Blessed almost exclusively with positive character traits she could have served as an inspiration to us when it comes to punctuality, hard-working, language acquisition and reliability concerning homework. And, indeed, she was one of the few foreign friends that I’ve acquired during my stay in Kazan who would insist on speaking Russian. Though my brains came steaming out of my ears after the initial first weeks of lessons (a great adaptation to the language occurred with great force – the cold of the Russian winter helped cool our overheated heads), discussions during our walk through dense snowfall back to the student’s dorm tickled out a little bit of energy.
What shocked me therefore, for it is in crass contrast with my perspective, that she was practically entirely unaware of modern Russian culture, music and even politics. Why burden oneself with learning a language as complicated as Russian if of is all but dimly aware of what to do with it? Possibly out of contemplation that, at the end of one’s studies, there WILL be job opportunities (e.g. as translator/interpreter)? Although I am grateful of her efforts to make me be understood by Russian natives, I am not sure if I managed to raise her interest in Russian culture.

Russia, the land of contrasts, where everything should be expected, especially as it to megalomaniac ideas or ideals that grazed off of both sides of the extremes. This probably stems from the harsh climate that provides the coldest of winters and the hottest summers alike – Russia, the great sauna. And in this conditions people had come up with gigantic living quarters that stretch as far as the eye can see, though, одновременно, containing as many constitutional elements as any right-winged populist speech – that is little to nothing. In between enormous hubs of technological progress that are scattered all over the stupendous surface of Russia lay 1000s of miles of backwardly nothingness.
The diversity of the Russian soul manifests itself in its inhabitants and in those who reside in it, even temporarily. On one hand we have the hard-working Italians, whose energy didn’t diminish all throughout the semester, while on the other hand we have Uka, the Inebriate Mongolian Viking.

Uka – epitome of laziness and sociability, mostly in combination with procrastination and alcohol abuse. Though always defending the grandeur of the Mongolian empire or whatever is left of it, his patriotism does not present a hindrance to interculturality, especially concerning exchange of musical knowledge. Therefore, Uka manifests itself mainly in two ways: a fostered sense of belonging to the Mongolian nation, enabling him to carry on lengthy discussions about this very country, laying out major historical aspects and political manoeuvres of the leading families to anyone (particularly to Chinese people), and the willingness to absorb every kind of musical recommendation, placing them in a cognitive spectrum – some genres feature qualities over other genres, with certain mixes amplifying in an ultimate greatness, namely Level 5. Level 5 mostly contain traces of folkloric songs, combined with elements of modern rock/metal. Some may say that this is Post Modern music. Here are some examples:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vztRqe_CHC0

Old friends sharing their experiences with governmental experiments concerning Acid in the tap water

Half-sarcastic, though witty transition!
Despite the repressive nature of our student’s dorm and its arbitrary nature, we got into touch with some Russian fellows from out of this dimension. Credits go to Kyösti.Official for this one, as he introduced The Dudes to us. The dudes befriended each other already at a very young age and probably swore at that time that they should destabilise Kazan as much as possible by incessantly challenging Russian laws and codes of behaviour. This expression of civil disobedience, though not necessarily always wanted or anticipated by themselves, displayed itself in a profound liking of foreigners, whom they invited to home parties; those would often escalate into trespassing onto a construction side.

Are they considered to be a threat to the state just because they climb abandoned places?
Maybe. It’s Russia. But this, far from being the worst things that we could have done, was barely a drop in an ocean of stereotypes and dangers (not just to the state, though). Not only had Pasha, one of The Dudes, tuned his car to such a degree that the acceleration was bound to self-obliterate the vehicle (while cables were hanging out from the front part), he also had a lot a gadgets in his flat that could pose a threat. It’s one thing to have some radioactive isotopes stored on the balcony where everyone smokes, it’s another to have extremely reactive Potassium stored it as well – in due course he’d demonstrate this element, and throw it down his balcony into the snow beneath; a formidable explosion followed its impact. They were some of the most exceptional people though. A radio communication set in the living room, a few guitars plus amplifiers that would made the neighbours go on a late-night rampage to the restore order, a good load of beer and a loaded playlist of car tuning always ready on youtube added up to an outstanding party. Those were the moments when my stuttered and strangled Russian rendered me particularly speechless – a feeling that is mostly negligible while hitchhiking.

I was glad to be with them, here at the end of all things

It’s difficult to asses how many more names, places and faces should be named, and, doing so, how many more names should be disfigured and regurgitated in a grotesque way. Despite the fact that all have individual traits 180° opposite to the ones even of like-minded people, some specific characteristics could only be tickled out, as the group dynamic came into play.
Ludwig and I have way to the combined Finish effort (Kyösti.Official and The TitAntti) at consuming beer before Русское кино in order to make the films a tad funnier. It was one of those precious masculine moments: 30 minutes of tranquility and sunshine, just about enough to soften the emotional downfall that followed the previous lessons. Beer shaped this lovely friendship.

Coincidence got me thinking back to Luxembourg, thanks to the two classmates of mine who both originate more or less in the same region as my humble self. I’m delighted to realise that, whenever I return home, there will be friends waiting whom I have met in the far East and therefore share a unique fondness of heart.
ComeIn, the cheap Anti-Café on the student’s dorm’s campus, often instigated me to spend my sunday evening in a discussing way, protecting well-grounded arguments for a good cause, beneficent to all. It was the single-most international meeting point in Kazan. Any ethnicity or nation was represented, and a vivid exchange never failed to establish between those who attended. The conclusion of this somehow found expression in us playing frisbee during the happy evenings of Ramadan, while listening to Russian Hard Bass and screaming “Parkour!” like absolute madmen (and women).
This last picture will accurate exemplify our relations, taken beside the Глубакое озеро in the fading months of winter, just after a refreshing swim. One will never know what’s gonna await one at the end of it all. Much that was will be forgotten, fading away, becoming rumour and eventually legend. And our moments were legendary, in our particular idiom. And that’s life for you. Some moments are so precious, that they are worth waiting and remembering.

“А “жизнь” – только слово, есть лишь любовь и есть смерть…
Эй! А кто будет петь, если все будут спать?
Смерть стоит того, чтобы жить,
А любовь стоит того, чтобы ждать…“
                 – Viktor Coi, Легенда

Breathing in the air of Glasnost and other stories from within the Ural mountain range

The time after exams was marked with a concluding travel in the northern regions of Russia. Our wanderlust had long been waiting for the escape from university and academic responsibilities, as neither me nor Ludwig had had any break in studying for the last 8 or 9 months (not including shorter holidays like Christmas or the madness around 9th may). Despite the failure of our initial plans of renting a car and comfortably cruising through Ural mountains with the eager desire to visit outstanding Russian cities like Asbest or Nizhny Tagil, we embarked on a journey that would have us wonder at the other, brighter sides of Russia that I myself had only experienced to a minimal amount. If you are by now wondering why you have never heard head of these cities, don’t trouble your mind for it was the purest coincidence that let us to Nizhny Tagil – it was but a meme that I found on the Internet before coming to Russia.

Russia is that big of a country, that when it’s 10am in Moscow, everything is still 1994 in Nizhny Tagil.

Right after the disgraceful ending of our academic semester in Kazan, we met up with the other exchange students for a beer, then took the night train to Ekaterinburg where we had the great privilege of staying at a Russian friend’s place for our time there. Ekaterinburg… the city where we initially wanted to do our exchange; the city that surprised us as soon as we arrived; the city that had held us in awe as long as were there; a city full of pleasant surprises. In fact, the place often felt somewhat related to a Western city, as it offered a rather free choice to the inhabitant when it comes to overcoming usual social restrictions that were always sensible in Kazan.
It, furthermore, is considered the Ural capitol of Rock music. After long strolls through EKB we stumbled upon a park surrounding a pedestrian lane around a embedded rivulet. From there a small tunnel underneath a main road in the centre led to a greater basin of that same rivulet. The tunnel was insofar remarkable and astonishing as it was the so-called “Виктор Цой Туннель” (Viktor Tsoi Tunnel): all of the walls were covered in paintings and graffitis of the deceased, but still illustrious singer/song-writer that carries the nickname “the Last Soviet Hero”. In the middle of it always stands an Asian-looking singer (Asian, but not Indian… it was rather the East-Asian looking type), replaying greatest Tsoi hits, while exploiting his own appearance to earn large amounts of money.

Besides many other memorable places one building in particular struck us as unbelievable: right there, in the middle of a Russian city, stood a perfect example of an Armenian church in red bricks. A Barevzez to the priest paved the way for a guided tour through the church and over the premises. After a few explanations our surprise and disbelief vanished as effectively as Vampires when they see sunshine for the first time; the amount of Armenians living on Russian ground is significantly higher than the population of the originating country itself. After providing us with knowledge he recommended us to visit an Armenian restaurant in town – after the painful acclimatisation that was the almost tasteless and meat-heavy Russian kitchen,  every bite of indubitably authentic Armenian cuisine made my taste buds shiver from excitement.

Before you continue, you should look up some pictures of Nizhny Tagil (Нижний Тагил) and let the view have a first impression on you. This is what we did. And everyone with whom we talk to about our idea of seeing this lovely Soviet industrial horror was in turn looking at us with a face of a Teletubby. And, indeed, arriving in the city and seeing it with our own eyes confirmed all of our wildest imaginations. That is: Thick clouds of smokes escaping the many factories intestines, all indicating a different intensity of danger to the health; Soviet buildings all over the place; stray dogs roaming the roads; and drunk men squatting in the parks.
All in all a promising start!
Not even ten minutes after our arrival, a few drunkards saw us two strangers walking around with photo material and immediately insisted on posing for a portrait of them, that we immediately printed out for them (one exemplary I used as a postcard and it should already circulate somewhere in Europe).

Sitting in a Vienna-styled café and Pirogi restaurant, we checked the Internet for places to stay and eventually decided to book an Airbnb for little money close to the central city. However, there appeared to have been a misunderstanding between the unfortunate owner of the apartment and a money-grubbing office behind, that were not even aware, that the place was for rent online (one phone call had already cleared our path, whereas the following one undermined the slightest possibility of the existence of that same place). As the payment had already been completed, we insisted on moving into the flat for the time our stay, and eventually ended up sitting in the office with the employees waiting for their unpleasant boss to show up. About four hours, a couple of teas and the additional payment of another 1000roubles caused the temporary evacuation of the mistreated owner and her two children. Right after sundown he headed out again to further explore the city, despite the unlucky star it seamed to stand under. While moving around aimlessly, Ludwig and I stopped in a wonderful backyard to take in all of the architectural details and the invigorating harmony of buildings and nature. A car stopped. The driver and his wife noticed me and Ludwig taking pictures. A few words were exchanged. More inhabitants appeared out of thin air and joined us. And before long we found ourselves in a car on its way to a bar that is being provided with local beer – beer brewed by a Mexican guy who studied the magic of brewery in Berlin! A beer that was truly excellent in taste and design of the bottles. I can only heartily recommend any friend of the hop brew to pilgrimage to Nizhny Tagil and support the local brewing art!

A great beer! Really! Trust me! Mexicans can create amazing beer – legally!

Random people desperately trying to understand what we were doing in their city

The initial idea of our trip to Nizhny Tagil was, however, a completely different one: we wanted pictures, pictures of industry! Of the raw, polluting power of the purest of all Russian factories. In fact, we wanted to capture the whole scale of monstrosities that is the patriotic Russian tank industry (Tagil is fond over its tanks. The local souvenir industry is making a large split between showing the beauty of Tagil and, on the other hand, showing the full potential of its factory output).
Little did we know that on the next day the city was engulfed with genuine patriotic sentiments over a marine battle that was won by Imperial Russia over a 100 years ago. As the only logical result, by midday all the men in the city had already consumed a dangerous amount of alcoholic beverages and strayed around the city, waving flags of the Флот (fleet). This, of course, meant some beautiful motives for Ludwig. After turning down a few invitations to vodka we made our ascend to Лисья Гора [Lisya Gora] from where me made some incredible shots of the dimly lighted, terrifyingly polluting factories that would make every climate activist go on a rampage.

The strange beauty of pollution at night time

After shivering for easily 3 hours in the cold wind that had been continuously harassing our position, we decided to pack our stuff and leave, though without being perfectly satisfied. As the night started descending upon us, the flame ceased a little, and the steam escaping the factory on a regular basis served as the main motive. The minute our stuff was packed away, the flame rose up to an height, yet unknown to us while another white cloud was spit out of the deepest intestines of the urban nightmare. The mixture created the effect of what looked like an enormous explosion over the factories.
Unfortunately, we didn’t manage to capture it. It was stunning. Simply breathtaking. The hours of exhausting waiting for the perfect moment would have been absolutely worth it, but our patience had left us five minutes too early.

On the following days, we said goodbye to EKB by drinking beers and hearing about locals expressing their concerns towards either immigration to Europe or homosexuals in general… big country, same absurd fear everywhere. They, however, provided us with an unexpected gift that had us rejoicing for many hours and carried us through the city on eagle’s wings. The reputation of the city, i.e. rock capitol of the Ural, loudly resounded through the evening streets. With the coda harmoniously ebbing away, we split from our friends in EKB and prepared for the trip back the next day.
At the train station, an unexpected sight caught our sight. A souvenir that is a fine addition to my collection of small presents from Russia.

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For more pictures, access Ludwig Schubert Photo’s Instagram Profile: https://500px.com/ludwig94
or: https://500px.com/ludwig94

“One can enjoy bureaucracy and therein identify the bizarreness of life” – Ludwig Schubert

Some of you might be slightly familiar with the rich Russian history. I will not continue with a full rendition of what has happened before, only state the most important factor that all major events have in common: time. Certainly, never has anything ever happened, is happening or will ever happen anywhere in this world or the next without the factor time. This accounts for all creation, all matter in the universe, all countries and all gummibears alike.

(Space is, of course, just as important. Historically speaking, however, space and time are not proportional. If you compare the first mention of historical relevance of two given countries, then you would quickly see how Luxembourg is relatively smaller than Mother Russia, despite the prominence it already enjoyed in Roman times.)

Time is a vital ally of Russia. In times of war, the military could just wait for the right moment to start a counter-attack. Sometimes the government would wait for its industry to slowly wake up. Most of the Russian people need to be patient for winter to end its long lasting choke-hold so that they return to their actual work or hobbies. In fact, this waiting is so deeply enrooted in the culture that is has found its way to spoken and written language alike: friends of the language should have a look at the usage of the aspects of the various verbs of movement.
In fact, time and patience or so important to the culture that everyone arriving in Russia is already welcomed with a lot of paperwork that will test their patience to the breaking point. You may want an example for the better understanding of this problem: If writing this blog required Russia bureaucracy to be written, that would mean that I would have to visit at least 5 different offices in 3 different buildings that are distanced by at least 500m (this is especially unpleasant in winter times when the temperatures drop below -20°), sign a dozen papers in official Russian and show three different types of copies of the exact same picture.

The door to the accountant’s office. Text says (among others): “Come in one by one!!!”, “Please, leave nothing behind”, “Working times”, yallah yallah

In reality, the situation is even worse.
Traveling to Russia, especially in the framework of a program as official and well-known as Erasmus+ will have you at your knees, begging for a quick end. The way leading up to our departure was paved with quicksand, rather than actual stones that could have facilitated or accelerated our movement. Every movement bringing you closer to being accepted to Russia and receiving a scholarship already requires a considerable number of signatures and time (meaning: 2 different Learning Agreements, 2 different Motivation letters as our first choice spontaneously changed, a number of meetings with the responsible, a CV and so on and all of which should be handed in in at least 2 languages and in different styles). All of this process took about 2 months of work, varying in intensity.

Moving on. The real work, however, awaited us after crossing the border to Mother Russia. The first days in the country that had been at choke-hold of frost for many months were marked by an overwhelming and utterly and completely nonsensical amount of paperwork that had to be carried out in great hurry and in dozens of offices. As one is required by law to register wherever one goes at any time, so that the surveillance state knows where its subjects and foreign elements plot against him, we immediately had to go through a medical examination in order to enter the prison/dormitory. This went as follows: A Turkmen girl impatiently waited for us in what was soon going to be our new cell/home and let us through the Poliklinika where a couple of doctors inspected our health, to make sure that we didn’t have Syphilis, Tuberculosis or some weird mutation of Western values or ideals (the latter they didn’t check). This small inspection exacted of us some hours of our lifetime, combined with a thorough visit of the many-store medical building.
The documents thus retrieved at the end of this examination granted us the right to actually enter our house (House 7, inhabited solely by foreigners). Once inside of the building, we very hurried through two more bureaus where we had to sign another wave of documents. They were, as all other documents or contracts, written in a complicated Russian – it is not entirely out of the world to believe that we transfered our souls to the Red Army in the course of our actions. Afterwards we could finally leave our luggage in our new living quarter where we were greeted by our new flatmate with a hospitable and warm “Oh! I didn’t expect any guests!”, before we put our snow capes back on and made haste to be back in our coordinators office. He, that is our coordinator Rustam – we figured that our nickname for him “Rastam” would be more accurate, if only he could grow his hair and started smoking hashish – then congratulated us on having achieved the rank of Novice Bureaucrat and for having survived the first day of our 5-month stay.
The day eventually came to end with two aliens falling into their beds in their cells in this prison in a strange and cold country, that had only given us a short impression of what the actual paperwork here could look like. At this point, when our exhausted bodies longed only for rest and the cessation of these absurd procedures, a sudden panic shook us awake: This had only been the first day, yet we still hadn’t chosen any of our courses that we were to visit, nor actually paid for the jail sentence/dormitory. In the course of the following weeks and months of our stay, we have learned to live with these absurdities and take it rather as a comical game, rather than an unfortunate and miserable stroke of injustice against us foreigners. It is a fact, that all beings who were regrettable enough to be born here, or those that have willingly and purposefully moved to Russia suffer very alike – with the minute distinction, that some were lucky enough to know Russian to a degree, that they can at least understand when they sell their kidneys to some authority when signing any paper.
However, once you have left the greatest part of the work behind you or have learned to live with it, then you will see that life moves swiftly and you may be surprised at the amount of meaningful work that a person can fulfil here, if they have overcome the hindering traps, obstacles and whatever may pave ones path – success is all about conquering the first steps and using all the help one can possibly find.

A small insight into the paper terror that we had to go through

Ein Angebot, das wir nicht ablehnen konnten: Wodka mit der lokalen Mafia

Nachdem wir in diesem absurden Russland angekommen sind und die erste Woche ohne Frostbeulen oder Erfrierungen überstanden haben, haben wir erste Kontakte mit der lokalen Mafia geschlossen. Ja.

Ein Spaziergang durch unbekannte Orte führt oft dazu, dass man seinen eignen Horizont permanent dehnt. Obwohl man sich an einem solchen Ort zur gleichen Zeit unsicher und angreifbar fühlt, da einem die möglichen Gefahren noch unbekannt sind, so sind sie gleichermaßen komisch attraktiv, weil sie Geheimnisse besitzen, die jenen vorbehalten sind, die sich aus ihrer „Komfortzone“ herauswagen. Könnte man sich vorstellen, eine unbedeutende und altmodisch aussehende Bar zu seinen Favoriten zu zählen oder neue und interessante Leute im routinierten Alltagsleben auf der Straße anzuquatschen? Kaum, denn es besteht ja an sich kein Grund dazu. Allerdings führt das zu einem Austrocknen der Inputs zum Gehirn, was wiederum in einem allmählichen Desinteresse an der Welt und an ihren zahllosen versteckten Wundern resultiert.

Nehmen wir dieses (zufällige) Wirtshaus zum Beispiel! 

Bar NEO sucht nach Trinity

Eine ganz klassische Bar für Einheimische in einem der Randbezirke Kazans. Von Außen begrüßt sie kaum Passanten. In ihrem 90s/post-Sowjet Stil hat sie eine Zahl an Alkoholikern aufgenommen und geschaffen, die vermutlich vergleichbar ist mit der Anzahl an Geburten in diesem Bezirk innerhalb der letzten 30 Jahre. Obwohl das Äußere etwas anderes vermuten lässt, so soll der Wert von diesem besonderen Ort zu keinem Zeitpunkt unterschätzt werden. Die plötzliche Einführung eines fremden Elementes kann sehr unterschiedliche Reaktionen bewirken: Eine davon könnte die spontane Entscheidung sein, den Fremden die persönliche Perspektive auf die Heimat zu zeigen.

Da Ludwig und ich uns bereits aus unser Komfortzone herausbewegt haben und uns mit neuen Lebensbedingungen auseinandergesetzt haben, versuchen wir zudem immerzu, unseren eigenen Horizont zu verschieben – viele Projekte wurden schon ansatzweise angeschnitten, Reisen geplant, Zusammenarbeiten mit neuen Freunden und ortsansässigen „Partnern“ ausgedacht. Um uns besser mit unserer Gegend vertraut zu machen, haben wir beschlossen, uns zusammen mit der italienischen Studentin die schicksalsträchtige Bar NEO anzuschauen (aus Anonymitätsgründen werden wir sie von nun an Maria nennen). Warum ausgerechnet NEO? Zum einen deshalb, weil die Bedeutung des Wortes auf etwas Neues hindeutet, auf den Anfang einer wahrhaft russischen Erfahrung, die mancherlei Stereotype erfüllt hat. Auf der anderen Seite könnte man eine Referenz auf den Filmcharakter Neo aus Matrix vermuten; er hat sich aus einer angenehmen Illusion verabschiedet, um, nach einer Phase des Schocks und Terrors, die Realität zu akzeptieren und letztlich seinen Platz darin einzunehmen (die Schwellenphase, oder auch Liminalität, hat ihn die Wahrheit erkennen lassen). Nachdem wir eine halbe Flasche Wodka im Wohnheim geleert hatten, haben wir uns sogleich eine weitere in der Bar bestellt. Die zunächst argwöhnischen Blicke haben sich in wohlwollende verwandelt, sobald wir angefangen haben auf Russisch zu reden.

So sah die Bar von innen aus: Die Dekoration war überaus überschaubar. An den Wänden hingen einige klassische russische Gemälde, leider in schlechter gedruckt in schlechter Qualität. Die Preise waren vergleichbar mit jenen im Supermarkt (i.e. ungefähr 400 Rubel für ½ l von einem guten Wodka). Die angebotenen Waren waren ganz klassisch: die üblichen Alkohol und Schnäpse, billige Biere, Snacks und plastifizierter, getrockneter Fisch. Alle Gäste (bis auf die eine Frau Natascha im mittleren Alter ausnahmslos Männer) haben Karten um Geld gespielt, bis auf den guten Evgenij, der alleine vor sich hin gedöst hat, weiterhin gab es noch ein dubioses Hinterzimmer, mit regem Begängnis, bis dahin sind wir ‘leider’ nich nicht vorgedrungen.

Wir haben uns sofort gut verstanden. Ich wurde „Puschkin“ genannt, wir haben gemeinsam Karten gespielt und dabei genüsslich Wodka getrunken, Bier, und später noch billigen Cognac (sehr schlechte Idee) . Nach ein paar Drinks wurden wir ungehaltener und schnell hat sich herausgestellt, dass wir mit Mitgliedern der lokalen Mafia tranken. Die prominenteste Person unter ihnen war natürlich die gastfreundliche Natascha. Die Gasfreundschaftlichkeit stammte aber auch daher, dass sie für keinen der Drinks Geld ausgeben musste und in ihrer Macht, Leute herumzukommandieren, ungebremst war. Aber was anderes hätte man erwartet von der Frau, dessen Vater zufällig „Besitzer der Krim ist“. Urlaub in der Ukraine garantiert! (Gott, für diesen Kommentar werde ich sicherlich gelyncht…). Nachdem wir herausgefunden haben, dass Natascha bereits mit ihrem 5. Kind schwanger war, haben wir ihr vorgeschlagen vielleicht ganz mit dem Rauchen aufzuhören, als nur auf Marlboro Light zu wechseln. Andererseits wäre das nur ein Tropfen auf den heißen Stein gewesen… immerhin hat sie den ganzen Abend lang Kaffee getrunken und sich mit Hochprozentigem tüchtig die Kante gegeben (auch Drogen waren ihrerseits im Spiel, wir schafften es irgendwie dankend abzulehnen). Irgendwann werden meine Erinnerungen undurchsichtig… aber mit vereinten mentalen Kräften, haben wir es dann geschafft ein einigermaßen klares Licht auf die dunklen Stellen zu scheinen: Die ganze Nacht lang sind wir in einem Taxi durch die verschlafene Stadt gefahren, immerzu auf der Suche nach dem schönsten Blumenstrauß Kazans, um damit das Grab von Nataschas Mutter zu schmücken. Ein normaler Montag Abend also. Hin und wieder haben wir irgendwo ein Päuschen eingelegt, um uns mit Drinks und Essen zu versorgen (möglicherweise auch ein Mal in einem georgischen Restaurant, aber daran kann sich niemand genau erinnern, jedenfalls wurden wir jedes mal eingeladen, Riesen-Buffet, fast nichts angerührt, um dann im nächsten Restaurant/Drecksloch wieder eine Großbestellung aufzugeben).

Bild entspricht nicht dem tatsächlichen Grab

Mein Gedächtnis ist erst bei Sonnenaufgang komplett zurückgekehrt. Als die ersten Lichtstrahlen das Dunkel der Nacht vertrieben, haben wir uns dazu entscheiden Natascha mitsamt ihres Mafiabusiness alleine zu lassen und zum Wohnheim zurückzukehren. Die Wächter haben sich sicherlich sehr gefreut meinen und Ludwigs Namen aufzuschreiben (erste von 3 Verwarnungen) als wir zurück gekrochen kamen – ich bin davon überzeugt, dass man den gütigen Herren und Damen der Nachtwache überhaupt erstmals einen Sinn im Leben gibt, wenn man versucht in einem solchen Zustand durch das bewachte Tor zu treten. Natürlich haben sie es nicht als nötig empfunden, auch noch Marias Namen aufzuschreiben. Als wir dann aufgewacht sind, haben wir sofort damit angefangen, die einzelnen Gedächtnisfetzen aneinanderzureihen.

Mit den neugewonnenen Kontakten und dem Wissen, dass ein wahrhaft russisches Abenteuer zu jedem Zeitpunkt losbrechen kann, garantieren wir unserer teurer Leserschaft, dass die Qualität des Blogs weiterhin ansteigen wird.

Mehr Artikel folgen sehr bald!

First impressions of the student’s dorm: The open and free student’s life has abruptly come to an end

Another chapter in this life in Russia was opened on the second day by introducing us the full-scale surveillance state that is the Kazan Federal University student’s dorm. People from free-thinking countries are stripped of their freedom, by willingly applying to this dormitory. After signing countless documents, going through major issues with bureaucracy, crawling through ice cold streets (-20° with strong winds) that are fully covered in thick and slippery covers of snow just to receive another “important” stamp that brings you closer to a self-induced abandonment of your right of freedom.

A high fence, littered with surveillance cameras all over, represents only the first obstacle. The two openings in that very fence are guarded by guards who keep a close eye for anyone (literally anyone) trespassing: friends, family, other students, nobility, proletariat or even terrorists will all be treated alike – a perfect representation of a classless society. Those who accept to be humiliated through million steps of horribly inefficient bureaucracy in order to get a yellow paper with their name, a stamp and a photo on it, will be allowed to give up many freedoms that they so dearly held onto. The houses cannot be entered after 10pm. After that, the doors are closed for anyone unknown to this house (about 30 in total). Students from other houses from the same dormitory premise must never enter another house. A true exchange with various groups of people and especially with locals thus seems to be doomed to fail. And from experience we know that communication with members of the Chinese National People’s Army is always problematic, as their foreign language skills are often reduced to a bare minimum, coupled with an extremely inefficient accent.

Alcohol, as well as other narcotics, are of course strictly forbidden. Though we wouldn’t be surprised if they were still circulating here. Not even the most militant and restrictive control state can get rid of what they label as “evils”. It is furthermore very unlikely that anyone can ban all forms of vodka from any place in Russia.

Also, some of the pavement gave way to a huge hole…

Concerning the rooms: The state of complete control extends itself to including fellow students to spy on each other, as there are those “responsible” who check on every room on their floor for order and the illegal smuggle of liquids. If you are caught too often neglecting hygiene or cleanliness of your flat, you can be banned from the premises.

Our beautiful Gulag

What Ludwig and I can say so far about our room situation is this, that our dear flatmate (dear clearly isn’t the right word to use in context with this individual) from Liverpool, England appears to fully and utterly incompetent. For the sake of anonymity, let’s call him Mike. Not only is Mike interested in only two things: having sex with Russian girls and pushing with wispy body with proteins and meat – an awful smell engulfs everything whenever he cooks – but he doesn’t wish to take responsibilities whatsoever. He may push his body with every kind of synthetical product on the market, and yet cannot lift 4 bags of trash and bring them downstairs. Clearly some mismanagement! As he doesn’t respond to our questions concerning the rubbish question, we will clearly be forced to beat our good advice into his protein-consumed brain.

However, life with Ludwig didn’t prove itself difficult in any way. We share a similar interest in music and alcoholic beverages – unfortunately they are fully prohibited and there’s no way we’re gonna smuggle illegal goods into a repressive student’s place – and find ourselves in a similar situation concerning bureaucracy. For the moment, I believe that our cohabitation will be peaceful… even if our new bathing towels indicate a different picture.

Stay tuned for more! For there will be more!

Wodkakonsum garantiert durch EU-Gelder: Eine Erasmus Story

Versucht es selbst mal! Bei der Erwähnung eines Begriffs, schreibt man sich den ersten Gedanken auf, der einem dazu einfällt. Nun überlegt ganz fix was euch durch den Kopf schießt, wenn man „Russland“ sagt. Ich habe den Test selbstverständlich mit zufälligen Leuten durchgeführt und dabei ist folgendes herausgekommen: Wodka, Putin, Bären und schöne Frauen.

Ludwig mit Vladimir Vladimirovich in der Föderalen Kazaner Universität

Ich habe angefangen das Land mit anderen Augen zu betrachten und mit von den Klischees zu entfernen. Aus diesem Grund, habe ich mich dazu entschieden, freiwillig nach Russland zu reisen um mich näher mich den Absurditäten vertraut zu machen. Im Rahmen des akademischen Austausches mit Erasmus (wir erhalten eine kleine Finanzspritze, daher der Titel), hat es mich zum Studium nach Kazan gezogen. Kazan ist ein Hotspot des friedlichen Zusammenlebens verschiedener ethnischer Gruppen. Allerdings bin ich nicht alleine angereist, sondern zusammen mit dem teuren Ludwig aus Berlin, um uns in ein Abenteuer zu stürzen in diesem kalten und zum großen Teil unwirtlichen Land. Keiner konnte sich eine Fortführung des Studiums ohne den anderen vorstellen, da wir uns bereits seit dem ersten Tag an der Uni kennen und seither eine ewig währende Freundschaft geschlossen haben, und… ja, ja! Wir kommen wohl wahrscheinlich nicht durch den „Homo Scan“, ohne dass alle Sirenen Alarm schlagen (leider gibt es die in echt und die stehen in jeder Metrostation).

Hier noch ein Bild von Ludwig:

Mein Blog wird mehr oder weniger aufgebaut sein wie zuvor. Neue, herausragende und ungewöhnliche Erfahrungen werden im gleichen eigensinnigen Stil notiert werden. Sobald wir uns in einer Situation befinden, die unsere Stereotypen von Russland entweder bestätigen oder in Frage stellen, wird ein Artikel darüber erscheinen. Aus jenem Grund werden wahrscheinlich Einträge zu den oben genannten Themen erscheinen – das heißt: Wodka, Putin, Bären und ähnliches.

Andererseits können auch kleinere Veränderungen vorgenommen werden. Im Kontrast zur traditionellen politischen Sphäre Russlands bin ich offen für verschiedene Meinungen und würde mich sehr darüber freuen, wenn jemand Kommentare oder Vorschläge für neue Einträge reinstellen würde. Welche Aspekte des typischen Lebens in Russland würde euch interessieren? Vielleicht die Küche? Oder vielmehr ein kleiner Reisebericht über eine Zusammenkunft mit einem Bären? Oder ist es ein direkter Vergleich zwischen russischer und tatarischer Gastfreundschaftlichkeit der euch faszinieren könnte?
Es gibt sogar noch mehr! Ludwig ist ein ausgezeichneter Fotograf. Darum haben wir uns gedacht, dass man unsere Talente vereinen könnte und meinen Blog mit seinen Bildern schmücken und andersrum seinen Bilden eine weitere Bedeutungsebene hinzufügen könnte. Leider können wir eine 100% Fortsetzung der Bildqualität nicht garantieren, da wir beide möglicherweise irgendwann unterschiedliche Wege einschlagen werden und ich daher auf meine eigenen Aufnahmen bauen muss.
Ein letztes Detail noch: Der Blog wird von nun an immer auch auf Deutsch veröffentlicht werden. Für die, die das Deutsche dem Englischen vorziehen und auch jene, die Deutsch lernen wollen und an einem direkten Vergleich zwischen den beiden Sprachen interessiert sind, könnte sich diese Entwicklung als interessant anbieten (leider können wir eine perfekte und fehlerlose Sprache nicht immer versprechen).

Fühlt euch frei, den Blog zu teilen, zu kommentieren, zu lesen, und, vor allem anderen, zu genießen!

(P.S.: Für weitere Bilder von Ludwig’s Seite, schaut euch doch seinen Insta an:
https://500px.com/ludwig94 )

The Art of Spending EU Money on Vodka

I did the test and asked random people about the first thing that pops up in their head when they think about Russia; the answers were as follows: Vodka, Putin, bears and beautiful women. (You should try this as home too. If anything else comes to mind, let me know.)

A picture of beautiful Vladimir Vladimirovich, taken in the University

I, however, just recently started connecting this country with something more than the cliché ones. As a matter of fact, I choose to go to Russia on my own to get further acquainted with what else one may find in this absurd place. I came to Russia to study in the academic framework of Erasmus, and for that reason we received a little financial backup (hence the title). To Kazan, to be quite precise. A hotspot of peaceful ethnic cohabitation. But I did not come alone. I am joined by dear Ludwig from Berlin on this adventurous journey through this cold and to the greatest part inhospitable place. None of us could imagine a continuation of their studies without the other, since we’ve met on the very first day of the university and ever since created an everlasting bond of friendship… we will certainly not get through the “Homo Scan” without the sirens going off (unfortunately, they are in every Metro station).

Here’s a picture of him:

My blog will continue more or less the same way that it used to. New, outstanding, unusual experiences will be noted in the usual opinionated fashion. If we find ourselves in a situation where we see the typical prejudices challenged or affirmed, you can almost be certain that an article about this topic will appear. For that very reason, there will probably be an entry on the keywords mentioned above, that is: Vodka, Putin, bears, and the like.
However, small changes shall be made. Contrary to the political tradition in our new habitat, I am open for different opinions and would very much rejoice at the sight of some commentaries or ideas for new entries. Which aspects of Russian lifestyle would you like to hear about? Maybe the cuisine? Or perhaps, you would enjoy a little travel story about a meeting with a bear? How about a direct comparison between Tatar and Russian hospitality?
There is even more! Ludwig is an excellent photographer. For that reason, we decided to put our skills together and promote my blog with his pictures and vice versa. Though, it is not 100% guaranteed that the quality of pictures will always stay the same, as we might walk different paths during our time spend here. For that reason, I might have to rely on my own pictures.
One last detail: The blog shall henceforth be translated into German as well. For those among you who prefer German to English, and for those who learn German and find it helpful to compare the two languages. (A complete absence of mistakes will, however, hardly be possible to obtain).

Feel free to share, comment, read and, most importantly, enjoy!

 

(P.S.: Here is a link to Ludwig’s artwork.
https://500px.com/ludwig94 )